I think of PH all the time. I think about some banal things that other people don’t think about. For example, how far can I walk during the day, when I will stop, when I should rest. I often imagine myself running. I wish I could run, even for a moment, but then suddenly, I remember everything, I think of my PH and then all my old thoughts come back. I can’t run, I have to walk very carefully, I can’t even dream about running. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I am adding up the distance, how long I am walking, and when I feel the need to stop I have to do it no matter where I am or whoever I am with.
A lot of time during the day I would like to plan something out, but I can’t because I have PH. Only in the morning when I wake up, can I plan something. It all depends on how I’m feeling, There is no detailed planning, I never know how I will feel later that day.
Jelena from Serbia has PH. Here she talks about the topic "How many times per day do you think of PH?" Please feel free to share the video to create awareness for PH.Jelene keeps fighting PH in respect to her father and younger brother that unfortunately died of the disease…#TimeMatters #pulmonaryhypertension #ph #phaeurope
Posted by Pulmonary Hypertension Association Europe on Friday, May 19, 2017
I want to forget that I have PH, but I have to take my medicine. I have to think about it too often, if I took my medicine, if it was the right dosage, what time I should take the next one, which one I should take next, etc. I am old enough to take care of myself, I can’t make a mistake or I will put my health in danger. It all adds more pressure. I don’t want my condition to get worse, with people like me it’s very easy. A cold, virus, forgotten therapy, stress, worry… it can all make me feel worse.
I think too much of PH. I don’t allow myself to give up, it’s hard but I always look at the positive side. It’s a constant physical and psychological fight. But I constantly fight it with the same force and determination. I have to move on, move forward! I can’t let PH get to me.
My father died very young. He was just 38. My younger brother died when he was just an innocent child. Because of them I keep pressing on. I don’t allow myself to give up! I don’t have that privilege! I owe them that fight! That is why I think of PH so much. That is why I am aware of the tragic consequences, what can happen to me if I don’t take care of myself in the best possible way.
I don’t let myself fall. I think positive. I will fight. I owe it to myself and to those I lost. And to those who unconditionally love me. I owe it to all PH warriors!